Monday, June 2, 2008

What I want people to think when I wear a nice sweater

1. Wow look at that sweater that Sean is wearing. It looks great – solid navy blue with one bright red stripe across the chest. Actually, now that I think about it, the sweater looks so good on Sean because it is so appropriate. It is a metaphor for how he exists in this world. He is that bright red stripe! He stands out amongst the navy blue sea of lame boringness that is us! He pierces straight through us, dividing us! Sean destroys the monotony of the world! I should really become a scientist so I can find a way to make him live forever.

2. Sean’s sweater looks good today, so good that I didn’t even look at his face. Did I see, out of the corner of my eye, that Sean has an attractive full-grown beard? Usually, when I look straight at him I think that his beard looks sort of weird and patchy, but today, distracted by his awesome sweater, it looked really manly and not at all patchy. Man, all those times I thought that Sean couldn’t properly grow a beard, I was wrong. I need to tell the others, who had a similar take on Sean’s facial hair, of our grave error. From now on I will hang my head in shame whenever I walk past Sean, never looking up at his beard again, but continuing to believe that it’s full and easy for him to grow.

3. Has Sean lost weight? Because it looks like he has in that sweater. He looks really thin and but also healthy, like he’s been working out. But not too much, like he’s always at the gym and doesn’t have a life. It looks like he works out just the right amount. I’m sure Sean has always looked this way and noticing it right now probably has nothing to do with the great sweater he has on. Sean’s body type is an interesting alternative to the too-skinny or too-muscular guys that I, an attractive young woman, usually encounter. I’ll make sure to send a mass email about Sean to all of my friends, who are also attractive young women.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Awesome. So good! Player are you in Chi-town yet?

brujyyvm!!